[About this blog] Inspired by local soccer player Mike Lim during my rookie reporter days at Singapore Polytechnic, I set up this blog in August 2002. I feel that blogging is a novel platform to document interesting facets of my life and my thoughts on certain issues. [Email blogger] ephraim@singnet.com.sg

Saturday, July 31, 2004

[standby ops]
the worst places could be one of the best places in fact...

for ndp ops this year and every year, technicians have to stay in camp... at first i was pissed... why can't we be like the rest who have passes and roam around the stadium checking out the parade... are we second class soldiers? isn't our unit supposed to be a special force??

crappy... combatants don masks and ipe... technicians better still... don mask, ipe and repair equipment... then we don't have allowance, no passes for ndp and still stay in camp... sicko... aren't we exposed to more or less the same hazards? wait till i ord, i shoot them man... in the papers that is...

anyway save for that unhapiness, at least i got to have a long nap from 2pm to 5pm and i even managed to do some writing of notes for my exam... but it was boring.... that's why today's entry is quite boring too...

some scoop:
39SCE celebrates singapore's 39th birthday with a bang!

a real bang that is... apparently, some 5-ton from mandai hill camp crashed into our mini bus... shows how great some drivers from other camps are... too bad this roving reporter was not on-site... but i did try calling the news hotlines.... and that is another story... haha...

Friday, July 30, 2004

[it's time for exams again]
finally... i have almost come to the end of my advanced diploma in mass communications course... just two more papers to go and one graduation project and i'll graduate....

so after i ord, i'll have an extra piece of paper qualification... hope that it'll help me enter my desired course...

meanwhile, i'll have to hit the books first....

Thursday, July 29, 2004

[hahaha]
funny crappy people at talkingcock.com should be barred to 100 days in sentosa for this... hahaha...

MediaCock Announces New BG Lee Sitcom
In a bid to make amends with the Gahmen over the Today newspaper debacle, MediaCock has decided to sponsor a new sitcom as part of the ongoing Remaking BG Lee Campaign.



Said MediaCock spokesman Mr. Boh Ho Quah, “’Living with Lee, Dear’ is a family sitcom which aims to endear Deputy Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong to Singaporeans by portraying him as a warm, all-rounded, almost motherly figure.”

The main characters of “Living with Lee,Dear” are as follows:

LOONG-LOONG: Our hero. People think he’s a dim son, but this “Lee-dear” dearly wants to show he’s a leader.

MADAM: Loong-Loong’s wife and personal assistant, who wears the pants in the house.

PAPA: If Madam wears the pants, then Loong-Loong’s father wears the blue windcheater. Grumpy and vengeful, but in an endearing sort of way, Papa is full of nuggets of wisdom which he cheerfully dispenses to everybody in the neighbourhood.

YANG-YANG: Loong-Loong’s energetic younger brother who’s always on the phone and full of pick-up lines.

UNCLE TONG-TONG: the faithful old retainer and also the butt of the family’s seat-warming jokes.

GIRL-GIRL: in keeping with the MediaCock tradition of importing faded Hong Kong stars to populate their programmes, Loong-Loong’s daughter Xiuqi will be played by former Cat-3 actress Shuqi.

BOY-BOY: Loong-Loong’s famously fair-complexioned son, who will be played by former Hollywood child star Macaulay Culkin.

“We want to show Singaporeans that the Lee family are just like you and I, real people with real, everyday problems,” said Mr. Boh, adding: “Of course, scripts will be vetted by the Deputy Prime Minister’s Office, otherwise we will have real, everyday problems ourselves.”

Here are synopses of the first four episodes:

DEAR LEE BELOVED
It’s Loong-Loong and Madam’s wedding anniversary, and they decide to spend it with the people who brought them together: the Social Development Unit’s Cabinet Romance Search Committee and the staff of Singapore Matchmaking Industries, a wholly-owned subsidiary of Temasek Holdings.

GREAT WAY TO FLY
Papa suddenly takes ill overseas and Loong-Loong orders Singapore Airlines to fly him home first-class for free. However, a petty reporter writes a story about how Papa subsequently tried to claim frequent flyer miles for the trip. The story ends happily with the reporter being permanently assigned to the New Paper’s SMS and ringtone ads department.

HARRY PAYS LESS
Special cross-over episode: Gurmit Singh guest-stars as Phua Chu Kang, who is forced to give a discount to the Lee family after bungling the renovations of their Nassim Jade apartment.

BG’S GREATEST HITS
Uncle Tong-Tong may have seen Loong-Loong slap Dhana the security guard, but can’t remember a thing.

According to MediaCock, the first episode is slated for broadcast sometime just before the next General Elections.

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

[new songs for ndp]
as the national day parade draws nearer, the people at talkingcock.com have also come up with solutions on educating the people sexually... and perhaps this may solve singapore's declining birth rates too...

National Songs to Get Sexy
In a desperate attempt to heighten Singaporeans' sense of awareness regarding sexual education, the Gahmen recently announced that they will be introducing a 'sexy' twist to our very familiar national songs.

Political pundits agree that this campaign probably follows in the wake of the recent and controversial decision to redeploy POSB to as a national sperm bank.

"National songs, like Count On Me Singapore, have always been very very popular. But today, we must stress a whole new dimension about patriotism. Now when we desperately need more children, I believe that instead of simply chanting, 'Count on me, Singapore!' it makes more sense for Singaporeans to actually moan, 'oh baby, cum in me, Singapore!'" said Minister of Procreation Limp Hng Kiang. "We intend to unleash a nationwide campaign to drill the new versions of familiar national songs into Singaporeans by playing the songs on radio and television."

Aside from ‘Cum In Me, Singapore’, Singaporeans can also look forward to other 'sexy Singaporean songs' like:

- Five Inches Arising (formerly ‘Five Stars Arising’)
- One Excited People (formerly ‘One United People’)
- Shoot In Me (formerly ‘Shine On Me’)
- We Are Seeing a Whore (formerly ‘We Are Singapore’)
- Kan People, Kan Nation, Kan Singapore (formerly ‘One People, One Nation, One Singapore’)
- Where I Chee Hong (formerly ‘Where I Belong’)
- Stand Up for Singapore (no need to change title)

However, the move has angered many parents because of the explicit sexual nature of the new national songs.

"Nao hiah! Nowadays this world very dirty. All Gahmen's fault. Last time I used to masturbate while playing porn videos on my TV. Now even kids can masturbate because of such saucy songs. How can like that! What is our world coming to?" said Mr. Lim Peh, a very worried resident of Tampenis, who also pens an occasional column for this website.

However, Minister Limp brushed away such criticism, saying, " Hng hng hng? Not true! Those parents seriously don't know how to hng, baby."

With that, Mr. Limp Hng Kiang proudly activated a powerpoint presentation, flashing the lyrics for the “remixed” version of ‘Count On Me, Singapore”:

CUM IN ME SINGAPORE
(Sung to the tune of Count On Me Singapore)

There is a new law for us to follow
Just believe, just believe
We must make love for Singapore
To make babies, to make babies
Boys and girls, let's do our part
Stand together, butt to butt
Our birth rate is getting low, and we must stop it
To make babies, to make babies

There is a need to know sex is good and ain't a sorrow
So let's drop our pants and do what Steve Chia died for
I ejaculated in your ass, it's a disaster Singapore shares
Stop oral and anal sex, oh horny you and me
Let’s make babies, let’s make babies

Cum in me Singapore, cum in me and on my ass no more

Boys and girls, don't poke your butts,
Fark together, test your luck
Our birth rate is getting low, and we must stop it
To make babies, to make babies

Chorus:
Cum in me Singapore, cum in me Singapore
Cum in me and on my ass no more

(Repeated Chorus)

Cum in me Singapore Singapore (FADE OUT)

And more are coming...

Saturday, July 24, 2004

[wishy washy]
this week was full of event organising...

first, i was arrowed to organise a cohesion day... my big boss, literally too, asked me to organise an outing for the whole department... the day for the outing was supposed to be this coming monday...

garang me, as usual, sent out email messages almost every day...

email 1: outing on 26 July, choose your location... cancel ration...

email 2: reminder message, program, reminder to cancel ration...

email 3: no need to choose location, boss choose liao, go ahead as planned

email 4: got rsm meeting on that day... outing cancelled... don't cancel ration...

immediate boss: rsm meeting cancelled... outing as per normal...

email 5: sub department cannot make it on that day... wait for further instructions...

immediate boss: okay... big boss said cancel....

and second, to be a marshaller ic for an outcamp run at bukit batok nature park...

end up, the event had to be held at a multi-storey carpark in bukit batok street 25!! why? cause of the rain this morning...

and so, i deployed marshallers to guide people to the toilet... hehe...

then came another big screw-up... guided the mini bus and went to the wrong carpark... was at level six then...

me: how come i don't see anybody huh?

comms 1: where are you?

me: deck 5B

comms 2: can't be nobody..

comms 3: you sure you at right location??

comms 1: i think you are at wrong carpark...

comms 3: we are at deck 5!! cannot see anybody??

comms 2: there are marshallers around the carpark... just follow them...

me: marshallers?? no.... oops... maybe at wrong carpark...

me: we going down to see the carpark block number

me: we going down...

silence....

reach correct carpark...

me: okay... we going up

comms 1: don't have to go all the way up... you are at wrong carpark...

me: we reaching correct carpark... now going up... reach in 2 minutes...

comms 1: okay... let me know when all setup is ready...

me: no table... tables still at the park...

comms 1: no need table lor...

comms 3: i am sending people up now...

me: okay... setup ready...

finally... they reach the carpark for breakfast then fall out...

and that's not all... we went to "holland" on the way to the park and "holland" on the way back...

now now now... how exciting is that??

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

[if we hold on together]
mediacorp's new starlets held on together for this stunt all for charity!!!

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

[the cbrd badge]
ever wanted to know how this cool cbrd badge looks like? here you go...



p.s. i was one of the emcees for the cbrd badge presentation ceremony...

Sunday, July 18, 2004

[the olympic emotion]
eminiem's real slim shady did not stand up, however, the swim shadys did... not only did they stand, they jumped too!!
 
the six guys, gary tan, lim yaoxiang, kenneth goh, mark chay, benjamin gan and tony hoon rocked the crowd at the swatch olympic emotion event at ngee ann city civic plaza... and boy were they hot...
 

 
they were perspiring after their three-set short gig and came down stage after that to hawk their debut album aptly titled "the deep end"...
 
comprising six songs, the album took almost a month to produce with a price tag of $15,000 according to lead singer gary tan...
 
various celebrities were also present at the event to run for money on treadmill, that is... they include mediacorp's alan tern and fly entertainment's melody chen...
 

 

Saturday, July 17, 2004

[now is the time]
PM Goh should have been back from his India trip... and that means it is time to know when DPM Lee will take over... 

so here goes... 

Singapore Government Press Release
Media Relations Division, Ministry of Information, Communications and the Arts,
MITA Building, 140 Hill Street, 2nd Storey, Singapore 179369
Tel: 6837-9666 

PRESS STATEMENT FROM THE PRIME MINISTER’S OFFICE
 
          Prime Minister Goh Chok Tong will relinquish his office on 12 August 2004. 
 
          He will formally advise the President to appoint Deputy Prime Minister Mr Lee Hsien Loong to succeed him.  DPM Lee has the unanimous support of the PAP MPs.
 
          The new Prime Minister will be sworn in at 8.00 pm on 12 August 2004 at the Istana. 

PRIME MINISTER’S OFFICE
SINGAPORE
17 July 2004

Thursday, July 15, 2004

[reaching out]
fann and hanwei go to great heights just to reach out for donations for the nkf children's medical fund charity show...

Monday, July 12, 2004

[changing faces, going places]
apparently, glutton square is not the only new thing at orchard... so when i went strolling for things to buy yesterday i was like a swakoo staring around this unfamiliar place... can't blame me though cause i have been cooped up at home for the last few weeks just so i can complete my assignments...

and yup, there's something about wisma too...


the wisma under construction


a brand new beginning

Sunday, July 11, 2004

[blissful wedding]
first time today that i attended a military wedding... kindof nice... although i saw it on tv during channel u's navy serial, it was an eye-opener to see it unfolding before your eyes...



held at noble house (a place that resembled a modern old shophouse), it was sheer fun just seeing how my fellow unit officers wield their swords... i even played with one...



of course it's a blissful marriage for the couple too... and yes, the food was fit for a noble!!! just don't ask me how much i put in the red packet... shhh.....

Monday, July 05, 2004

[bowled over]
just back from a sushi buffet... and, yes, i saw that waiter again... don't be jealous charlene...

thanks to my uncle for teaching me how to bowl... really great man!! at least i had some prior training before...

39sce spent half a day at marina south for a bowling cohesion activity...



and it was so great a time... for bonding, that is...

while it was kindof tiring as we had to meet the quota of four games, time was spent wisely to take a nap or two...



and even some delicious carrot cake too!!

it sure brought smiles to some...



but others were just too happy that the whole thingy was over... for me, it was a splendid time spent with cool friends...

Sunday, July 04, 2004

[not on ice cream alone]
kindof stayed at home the past two days completing my analytical commentary article for my print media....

and that means that i sit and stare at the computer screen the whole day...

and guess what i had for lunch?

people who know me well would know that i love ice cream... having worked at swensens for 6 months after the o levels, i have developed a strong liking for it...

that is why i can have ice cream for last night's dinner and today's lunch!!! and a little bit more...

for dinner...
1 tub of walls chocolate chip ice cream
1 piece of leftover fish and chips

for breakfast and lunch...
1 tub of walls raspberry ripple ice cream
3 pieces of marks and spencer sultana cookies
12 pieces of crab meat sushi
1 rice dumpling

all these consumed in the comfort of my room!!! haha....

Saturday, July 03, 2004

[home for ndp]
checked out the ndp 2004 webbie today... and no, i did not get any tickets for the show...

so i'll get ready to sing my way 'Home' at home with Kit Chan and JJ Lin at this year's ndp...

instead of a new song, this local favourite has been chosen for the ndp again this year....

Brigadier-General (BG) Chin Phei Chen, Chairman of the NDP Executive Committee said: "The reason we stand out so strongly is because of the strength we have, the passion that our people have. I am sure that whoever sings this song, you'll find that you can associate with it very well."

and yes, the passion is all you need even if it is just staying at home when the lights go out... way to go singporeans!!!